Greek word for burden = “excess burdens.” Like boulders. Load = “cargo,” or “the burden of daily toil.” Like knapsacks. Problems arise when people act as if their boulders are daily loads, and refuse help. Results: either perpetual pain or irresponsibility. Boundaries help us distinguish our own property lines so we can take care of ourselves and be good stewards of who we are. Concept of boundaries is rooted in the nature of God Himself.Boundaries are like fences to keep the good in and the bad out. God defines Himself as a distinct, separate being, and He is responsible for Himself. Boundaries in the spiritual world are just as real but harder to see Boundaries define your soul and help you to guard it and maintain it. Boundaries show us what we are responsible for, and they help us define what we are NOT responsible for. Helping someone who has a burden too heavy to bear. A boundary shows me where I end and someone else begins. Gal (NIV): “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” = Responsibility TO one another.When kids set boundaries, it’s essential that they be honored.“I know, you don’t want to take a nap right now.” When parents detach from a misbehaving young child instead of staying connected and dealing with the problem, they tell a lie about God’s constant love.
Our words let people know where we stand and give them a sense of our “edges” that help say, “This is where I end.” “I don’t like it when you yell at me!The Bible supports the idea of limiting togetherness for the sake of binding evil.Time off from a person or a project can be a way to regain ownership over some out-of-control aspect of your life where boundaries need to be set.How many marriages would have been saved if one spouse had followed through with the threat of “If you don’t stop drinking/coming home at midnight/hitting me/yelling at the kids, I will leave until you get help! The problem comes when someone interrupts the law of sowing and reaping in another’s life. A common boundary problem is disowning our choices and trying to lay the responsibility for them on someone else. Two aspects of limits: Really, a misnomer: we can’t do that.” How many young people’s lives would have been turned around if their parents had followed through with their threat of “No more money if you quit another job without having another one lined up,” or “You can’t live here if you continue to smoke marijuana in my house.” 2 Thess : “If one will not work, neither let him eat.” God does not enable irresponsible behavior. (Prov : “A worker’s appetite works for him, For his hunger urges him on.”) Consequences give some good “barbs” to fences. A person’s drinking or abuse or irresponsibility SHOULD have consequences for him. “I had to,” or “She made me,” or “See what you made me do? What we CAN do is let limits on our own exposure to people who are behaving poorly; we can’t change them or make them behave right. He doesn’t set limits on people to make them behave.