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And that is something I do – I look specifically for empathy.
Knowing that I have that pattern, I made a promise to myself to pick up on coldness whenever I find someone attractive and to walk away.
I’m not a psychologist who has been trained to delve into your past; my specialty is helping women in the present model confident behavior to elicit better results in the future.
Your issue, in this instance, isn’t lack of confidence; it’s something that runs much deeper, something you only hinted at when you say that your family “messed you up.” Without knowing you, I have to concur.
While they will still lust for the hottest woman around, they’ll ultimately marry someone in their league, which, empirically, is not always that attractive.
Your issue, however, is a little more extreme, and reminds me of a client I had a few years back.